Making the Most of Our Time and Space: Trying not to go crazy while learning, teaching and working from home.
We’ve been home for exactly one month today. Suddenly and without much preparation, the four of us, my daughter Olivia, a sophomore in high school, my son Evan, an 8th grader and my husband Erol and I had to divvy up our living space and create home offices and classroom spaces for us all. Sounds easier said than done. It might be, except for the fact that our beloved little home is a Cape Cod, adorable and quaint as it may be, it was meant only to be our ‘starter’ home. However, soon after our son Evan’s dramatically premature birth at just 25 weeks gestation, we found ourselves saddled with endless bills for all sorts of therapeutic interventions. So, despite the fact that we have outgrown the space and had greater aspirations, our sweet, yet tiny starter home has become our ‘forever’ home. It can get even dicier when you factor in the fact that Evan must cope with the challenges that his cerebral palsy, ADHD, Autism, and sensory integration issues present when cooped up inside for too long. How do we all manage to keep from going completely bonkers? We get creative- really creative– with our time and space.
Time: The teacher in me can’t help but develop an unofficial schedule to help maintain some semblance of structure and order. I’ve often felt out of control over our current situation, so I must fight the constant urge to micromanage the minutia of our every day lives. I try to segment the day into a routine that works for all of our daily demands. It’s taken awhile, but eventually, we’ve all become accustomed to our new sense of ‘normal.’ First thing in the morning, the kids are up and busy with school work via either Zoom and/or or Google Meet sessions. Most of their work is completed via their Chromebooks, so it’s very quiet for a better portion of the morning as I too am busy trying to work with colleagues and my own students. The morning flies by very quickly. Erol has worked from home for a few years now, so the transition to shelter in place hasn’t been too much of stretch for him- however keeping everyone and the dog quiet while he’s on conference calls all day long can become quite challenging, which is why we have also had to become very innovative with the available space in our humble abode.
Space: We have adopted the divide and conquer approach when faced with the challenge of limited space. I usually take the desk in the kitchen, while Liv is upstairs in her room, Erol takes over the front porch office, and Evan typically likes to stretch out in my room. In the afternoon, Evan will have PT, OT, Speech, and Neuro-Prompt Therapy sessions, which he thoroughly enjoys. It gives him a chance to stretch his muscles, get input and connect with a team of people who really care for him. The name of the game is to separate and give one another the space needed to complete all of our individual work. Considering the square footage of this house, I am amazed at how well we’ve managed to avoid any real blood-shed! When things become unbearable and the kids are about to brawl, I will have them play an impromptu game of Twister, do some chores around the house, or simply partake in some of Evan’s PT stretches to help clear their heads. It is frustrating at times to have my teenage kids fight like when they were younger, but I have to remind myself that this is very new to us all and we have to create a new sense of ‘normal’ for now which involves new activities.
Activities: If the weather permits, then we are off for a walk or two, or four or ten…. Honestly, it depends on how much everyone is getting on one another’s nerves. We typically try to take a walk after the kids are officially ‘out of school’ meaning around 2:30 p.m. These walks provide both kids with greatly needed exercise, fresh air and Vitamin D. However, for Evan, the walks also feed his sensory diet and need for stretching out his areas of high tone, as well as helping to build up his areas of low tone due to his cerebral palsy. Our town is also very tiny, approximately 800 people give or take a few toddlers. We are very fortunate to have a track at the nearby fair grounds, the ground is flat and very accessible for Evan. Running directly parallel to the track is a river, which is a hidden gem, chock full of all sorts of entertainment. My children have rediscovered the forgotten sport of skipping rocks, creating ripples in the stream with sticks, walking and just enjoying the beautiful blue sky on a sunny day.
Other days, we simply just hangout in the backyard and try to draw or do something creative that doesn’t involve any kind of technology. Giving the kids time to decompress away from any kind of phone, IPad, Chromebook, video game, etc. really helps to allay some of the stress that we have recently noted since we’ve all been home. Both kids are very creative and since Evan loves to draw, we provide paper and pencils and see what results they yield. Drawing can provide a very simple, inexpensive, and creative source of entertainment.
Later in the afternoon, we try to have some quiet time, which is not always an easy feat! Evan is a voracious reader and we recently ordered ten more of the Disc World series written by Terry Pratchett to keep him busy. He loves to read aloud to any captive audience he can gather. It’s a great way to practice some of his speech goals and it helps to break up some of the periods of isolation I think he was experiencing. By providing everyone with a little positive ‘time out’ helps to make the time together all the more enjoyable.
There are also parts of the day, when I recognize the need for input. Here Evan’s hugging his weighted bear given to him by my sister Khara. It’s a great source of comfort on many levels.
There are times when I completely cave and surrender to the allure that only electronics can provide. Below, Evan is chilling with his Chromebook, Kipper and a cozy blanket. I am grateful for the extended time spent at home since it has afforded me with the opportunity to put away all of my holiday decorations! Take note of the Santas that have lingered far too long!
Being home bound has also provided us with the chance to revisit some of our long-forgotten favorites activities such as building with Magna-Tiles. Evan went through a stage when all that he wanted to do everyday, all day long was build with his Magna-Tiles. Recycling some of our pastimes has provided Evan with the opportunity to use his fine motor skills, creativity, and ability to focus while challenging him to build with his hands.
Expectations: We have certainly needed to revise our level of expectation and version of our daily lives. There are days when I get stuck in the doldrums of the hum-drum tasks and truly wonder why I never stop doing laundry since we never go anywhere and my children seem to wear the same thing everyday! However, there are also times of incredible joy and I’ve come to cherish the idea of not having any definitive plan. Those moments are rare and precious and I try to savor them for as long as possible. Now that we have slowed down our pace and taken stock of what is truly important, we can enjoy the simplicity of just spending a silly moment together.
In the end, we are all just trying to do the best we can with what we have, keeping in mind just how fortunate we are to be safe, together and healthy. Looking forward to sunnier days….
Wishing you all continued health, fun and plenty of sunny days.
~K
