Feeling Grateful and Keeping Sight of What’s Important This Holiday Season…..
‘Tis the season for busy schedules, holiday concerts, recitals, celebrations, and parties. It’s also a time of year to recognize the important people in our lives with a gesture of some sort. My children are extremely generous people and want to provide gifts for all of their teachers, bus drivers, occupational, speech, physical and social skill therapists, personal aides, nurses, guidance counselors, principals, vice-principals, etc. While it’s incredibly thoughtful that my children want to celebrate the people in their lives with a small gift, it’s me who has to purchase, wrap, and deliver these said presents. By the time that I finished my school day yesterday at 4:oopm, I was completely and utterly exhausted. I felt as though I could have slept until the spring thaw. However, now that my busy school week had ended, I had to focus on my home life and preparing for the upcoming holidays. This was no small feat, as it meant that I had to first clean my house in order to find some of the gifts that I had previously purchased. Once I unearthed them, I had to determine which items from my ‘list’ still remained and needed to be bought. Unfortunately, as I went through the piles, I had forgotten for whom each gift had been obtained. So I decided to move on to writing out holiday cards. Earlier in the week, I had begun this process, but somehow became distracted so the cards were now scattered on the kitchen desk – unaddressed and unmailed.
In the midst of it all, Evan came down with a nasty sinus infection. Having low muscle tone in his face due to his cerebral palsy, clearing his nose remains a challenge, so despite my efforts to flush his nasal passages with saline we finally relinquished our homeopathic remedy and opted for a more traditional approach with an antibiotic. While Erol took Evan to the pediatrician, I attempted to run around like a crazy person, along with all of the other crazy people trying to shop the Saturday before Christmas. In effort to clean up my dining room, I began to move the piles of junk to the desk in the kitchen. Clearly, I was just spinning my wheels in regard to the cleaning and organization department and was no where near ready to begin the wrapping stage, so I decided to clear my head by attempting to finish my shopping.
In addition to the usual festivities, this year, my daughter Olivia will be turning 16 years old on January 6th. She truly has been my epiphany and continues to change my life for the better each and every day. Being the older sibling to a special needs brother, Olivia often assumes a role far beyond her years in an attempt to help Evan any way that she can. While it’s incredibly helpful, it can also be a heavy burden for her to bear. In effort to honor Olivia’s on-going support for Evan, I typically try to make time for just the two of us to do something together. Sometimes I will take her for a pedicure, wander around a store, or we will plan a special gluten-free dinner just for her. Thank God that she is still at an age where she enjoys spending time with me and I continue to savor every minute that I have with her! I know that these days are numbered, the older that she gets… However, today, as we ran from one store to the next, I looked at my daughter and realized how stressful I was making the experience. She was hurrying by my side as I would dart from one end of a store to the next, grabbing this or that, mumbling to myself like a madwoman. I would suddenly stop and she would bump right into me. This happened on more than one occasion in the midst of this chaos that I created, Olivia continued to repeatedly apologize for my loony behavior. That was when I knew that I needed to stop, take a breath and re calibrate my approach to the holiday.
In addition to hearing my own stomach grumbling, I realized that Olivia must also have been starving as well. We’d set out for our shopping marathon around 9:30am and it was now a little after 2pm. I knew that there was a salad and grain bowl place nearby, so I put whatever I had in my hand back on the shelf, grabbed her and headed for the car. Before long, we were seated in front of a bowl full of delicious greens, grains and toppings. Looking at her, I knew I had made the right decision. Whatever we had in our dining room would have to suffice, I was not only making myself nuts , but I was also creating angst for her as well. We ate, we laughed and we talked.
My house is still topsy-turvy, however my stomach is full, my girl is happy and I am feeling eternally grateful for all that I have.
Wishing you all love, peace and happiness this holiday season!
p.s. I eventually got both rooms cleaned up and ready for the holiday!
