Happiest of New Year’s Resolutions…. Not to Make Any Resolutions…
Every year since I was very young, I would look forward to New Year’s Eve with a sense of great anticipation and heightened excitement to the new year and the countless opportunities it promised. As I grew older and had a family of my own, I would make resolutions to live a healthier life, eat better, exercise more, have a cleaner house, grade my papers more quickly, etc. Now, as a parent to a special needs child, I resolve not to make resolutions- of any sort. I have come to the realization that in place of meaningless short-term resolutions and empty promises I know I will never keep, I now set realistic goals for both my child and myself. You might be thinking, what’s the difference between a resolution and a goal? Well, in my humble opinion, a goal is something that’s long term and needs to remain flexible, open to constant revision. A resolution, on the other hand, is a promise to achieve something- one and done. Having a child that is on the Autism Spectrum and also has cerebral palsy and ADHD, I realize that my son will have great days and not so good days. There will be moments of incredible growth and progress where he will successfully meet milestones we never before anticipated. This will be sharply contrasted by devastating setbacks and crumbling disappointments with challenges that had been previously overcome and were now effortless. It’s a life of peaks and valleys, ebb and flow, ups and downs, a process of trial and error, push-pull, all the while tweaking our expectations, level of support and notion of a new ‘normal.’ It’s a life of revision, redirection, resurrection and rebirth. One that’s incredibly difficult, but also incredibly beautiful. So, on this New Year’s Day, I resolve not to make any resolutions, and instead will continue to live in response to what my son needs and set goals accordingly.
Happy New Year’s to everyone! Wishing you all peace and happiness as you embark on this new year and all that the potential it holds.
~ Peace and love!
Kristen
